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Narcissistic Personality Symptoms

  1. grandiosity / exaggeration
  2. fantastic thinking / romantic
  3. believes special / unique
  4. requires admiration
  5. entitled / demanding
  6. exploitive / manipulative
  7. lacks empathy
  8. envious / jealous
  9. arrogant / haughty

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All text is copyrighted © Stephen McDonnell 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007,2008, 2009. 2010, 2011.



A bad apple spoils the barrel, or your soul.

What happens when you are surrounded by people who constantly tell you what you are and aren't? What happens when people gossip about or ignore you? What happens when every advertisement tells you what you need to buy to succeed? How do you feel when good manners and politeness disappear? What happens when someone criticizes you without reason? Some of us can brush off the casual critic, the snide remark, or the social snub. But contrary to the saying, "sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me" , we are social creatures who interact with other people, and we are affected by other people's emotions.

Constructive criticism is an oxymoron. Criticism doesn't build up one's ego - compliments do. When another person vents their spleen on you, it's like throwing acid on someone. It burns, and eventually the pain is etched in the brain. Insincere compliments do the same thing; an effusive friend who is only out to protect your good name. The charmer N says they are only thinking of your best interests, as they tear you down. (The criticism tells more about the critic, than the person being criticized.)

What then is normal criticism? Ask yourself, did you learn something from the criticism that will help you or did you feel belittled? If you are a narcissist any criticism will make you feel bad about yourself.

How to deal with Difficult people: criticism, idiots, control freaks

Any interaction with a Narcissist will make you feel as if you have been used. What we are talking about is 'invasion', an attack on boundaries that is meant to break them down and then take over thoughts and souls. Call it the devil, call it Marketing; both want to sell you. Call it hypnotism.


Introjection occurs where a subject takes into itself the behaviors, attributes or other external objects, especially of other people. A common pattern is where a child introjects aspects of parents into its own persona. According to Freud, the ego and the superego are constructed by introjecting external behavior into the subject's own persona.

Introjective identification Where a person finds another person attractive in some way, then they will often take a part of that other person and introject that part into their own ego. In this way, they become more like the admired person. Also, having a part of that person in them, they feel closer to them and usually like to be physically and emotionally closer to them, perhaps for fear of distance leading to the introjected part (particularly if it is not fully internalized) being lost.

Freud used introjective identification to describe how Christians introject Christ into themselves in order to be more like Him. This is made viscerally explicit through the process of Mass or Communion, where they symbolically eat Christ's body and drink his blood.

Melanie Klieg's theories

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